I’m posting this essay on both of my blogs; here at virginialaken.com which deals with MCI and at hopeforcouples.com on which I write about aging and intimacy. I’m doing so because emotions and love are integral components of both areas—at least in my experience. While I try to be generally optimistic, stoic and hopeful—(certainly, I…
MCI (Mild Cognitive Impairment)
On this blog, I share my story of coping with an MCI diagnosis, how it has affected my lifestyle and the tools I've learned to preserve or improve my quality of life. Click here for the introduction to MCI, and click here to learn what the condition is.
My new approach for with negative thoughts
“A negative thought can be sensed before it reaches the mind…” When I read this discerning statement this morning during my mediation time, I wrote in my journal: “I would add, in addition to negative thoughts, the same is true of thoughts of loss and self-pity. So many times I focus on what I can…
Caregiving for myself
Throughout my journey with MCI, my caregivers have played an evolving and ever more important role in my quality of life. Keith is an excellent caregiver—and getting better all the time. He’s patient, observant, and has transitioned from jumping in to try and fix any bump in my road, to asking “Do you need me…
Why I have difficulty asking for help
Last week I had coffee with two women who, inadvertently through their conversation, helped me gain insight into why I have such difficulty asking for help. Both of these women were—I’m guessing—twenty to thirty years younger than me (I just turned 72 this past March). Each woman had, for at least the past eight years,…
“You seem just fine…like nothing’s wrong.”
Recently a good friend of mine, whom I haven’t seen in almost a year, invited herself over for lunch (a common occurrence, now that I’m no longer driving). She is my daughter’s age, with two children in college; one just finishing a year in Italy and the other in his last year at school on…
Evolving family dynamics
Dealing with MCI continues to be an uncharted journey, not just for me but also for my husband/caregiver and my family. Just when we seem to have established a routine for how we all work together and life seem to be humming along pretty smoothly—things change. In my experience with MCI, the illness itself ebbs…
Why haven’t you written about your fears?
This was a question my therapist asked me last week, and it has been circling in my thoughts for an answer ever since. I’ve been seeing the same therapist monthly since my diagnosis almost two years ago. I have mixed feelings about therapy. I know therapy is good for me, in that is a safe place…
Dementia research and initiatives
This spring I was a participant and/or test subject in three interesting programs focused on dementia and Alzheimer’s. Programs in this field are being conducted all over the United States, which speaks to the growing awareness of the increasing number of people impacted by memory and cognitive decline—both the afflicted as well as the caregivers….
Withdrawing is important to me
I’m fairly certain my therapist and most people who work with folks who have memory and cognitive issues will balk at this post; nevertheless I’m going to write it anyway. Part of my morning practice is to read from a selection of books of inspirational short essays or thought-provoking poetry—many of which I’ve read through…
Planning ahead for staying sexually active
As I’ve mentioned in past posts, Keith and I are fortunate to be associated with The Program in Human Sexuality at the University of Minnesota. Click here for an overview of the program and a video of Keith’s and my participation in a panel presentation to university medical students. This program has been of great…