September 11, 2021
The communication networks are brimming with scenes of the fateful 9/11 destruction. I used to remember quite easily where I was and what I was doing when the attack happened. I think I was living in Florida and folding diapers while watching television.
I’m sure most people can testify to the same embedded memory of time and place.
There are many events that are embedded in my mind. My wedding day after almost two years of engagement. My elation when I found out I was pregnant. Moving to Winona, a town of people who welcomed me with open arms and continues to be my safe haven. Family trips, especially to Europe. Family dinners full of good food and hearty laughter. The leaving of my granddaughter for college on the East Coast. My visits with my son and daughter-in-law which were filled with laughter—and, of course, good food. Sharing meals with loved ones, which has been a life-long tradition I learned from my family of origin and has been carried on ever since.
Of course, there are memorable tragedies as well. My parent’s deaths—one tragic, the other from natural causes. My grandson’s suicide, which makes be pause and take a deep breath each time I think of it. A tragic accident I was in a number of years ago, which required life-flighting me to a nearby trauma center. The first time I was diagnosed with MCI, and when the diagnosis was changed to Alzheimer’s.
When I bring forth these significant events in my life, I accept the good with what didn’t seem so at the time. And I always remind myself, if I only experienced happy times, I wouldn’t realize the gift. It’s the times of joy and happiness that sustained me through the tragedies and sad times.
This attitude seems especially helpful to me during my journey into Alzheimer’s disease. I do my best to review and remember what a great life I have lived: full of love and laughter, disappointments and sorrows…but always sustained and supported by my loving family. Again, I think of the wisdom of the saying…if we didn’t experience any sadness, we wouldn’t be able to recognize happiness.
Even while I realize my time on earth is coming to an end, I try my best to look up rather the down. To smile instead of cry. To embrace family, friends, even our pets. And to continue to look out my windows as the magnificent beauty that surrounds me, marveling at nature’s wonderland.
I know this post is a bit sappy, but it feels so good to write about love, kindness, friendship, nature, beauty, and the full life I have lived so far.